Thoughts on Romans 7

“For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I. If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good. Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.

“I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me. For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.”

—Romans 7:14-25

I realize more and more nowadays that the continuum of seemingly insignificant events in my everyday life is actually composed of a series of much more delicate and significant moral decisions. The way I get up, hurry to the bathroom, grab a sandwich and coffee before school, sit in a chemistry class, etc. may seem neutral at the outset. They seem morally insignificant, neither particularly good or bad. However, I notice small, quick, at times sleight-of-hand decisions of the heart. And they seem to me my choices indeed. 

I suddenly wish that at the moment of making such a choice, that not only my desires that push me toward pride, envy, lust, or hate are evident to me but also all the reasons not to. Because in my most reflective moments, I recognize them as wrongs. Then, I have all the reasons available to me why I ought not; why I should have chosen otherwise. It is one thing to be able to do this upon reflection and another to be able to actually practice what is right. Yet I say this hopelessly: it seems that there will always be a gap between knowledge and action. I will fail over and over again at practicing what I take to be good. It isn’t to claim omniscience in regards to moral knowledge. Of course not: the fact that such a gap exists is itself a testament toward my inability to fully understand what I am practicing or doing at the moment of action. To hope for the complete self-evidence of desires and reasons is also quite ridiculous. 

Perhaps this is where being a certain kind of person comes into play, where one habituates a way of life rather than simply think in favor of it. Perhaps this is where Romans 7 starts making sense. It did for me at least.